Letters to Jenna #1

I remember the first time I saw your picture. I was captivated. I envisioned you playing on the swingset in the back yard, tucking you into bed at night, throwing you a birthday party…I know we have missed a birthday during this long wait. I pray that this process moves quickly, though in God’s time, so we don’t miss another.

The boys are excited and eager to have you home. They ask everyday, when will “Jenna” come home?

I look at your picture every day. I wonder where you are now. I wonder how long you’ve waited. I wonder if you have any idea how our hearts are being knit together during these months. I wonder if you’ve met Jesus. I wonder how God is preparing your heart.

I wonder what you will like–your favorite color, your favorite games, your favorite characters.  Will we watch Hannah Montana, listen to Jonas Brothers, play hula hoop and hopscotch and paint our toes?

The wait is long. The social worker suggested treating the wait like a pregnancy. I responded, “I try, but when you’re pregnant, your child doesn’t live with someone else!”

I struggle with what to pray for you now. While I want you to be happy and feel cared for now, it would be difficult to uproot you from that. Of course, I don’t wish you to be lonely or hurting. I can only pray that if it is God’s will for you to join our family, that your heart would be opening up for us, that your soul would be ready for Jesus, and that your life would be ready to be knit together with ours.

We can’t wait to bring you home.

Love,

mommy in waiting